Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)

"Devils don't come from hell beneath us. 

They come from the sky."

Batman v Superman: Yawn of Justice.

Bloody hell... Okay, here's the official synopsis on IMDb:

Fearing the actions of Superman are left unchecked, Batman takes on the man of steel, while the world wrestles with what kind of a hero it really needs. With Batman and Superman fighting each other, a new threat, Doomsday, is created by Lex Luthor. It's up to Superman and Batman to set aside their differences along with Wonder Woman to stop Lex Luthor and Doomsday from destroying Metropolis.

This synopsis represents exactly what is wrong with the film itself. It's confused, it's too long, it's not structured, it's self important and it's too cluttered.

The hugely anticipated DC Superhero face off is upon us and, racking in at a gargantuan 151 minutes long, it encapsulates everything that's wrong with the superhero movement that seems to have the world drooling at the mouth for more. 

Where do you start with a film like 'Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice'?

The beginning is normally the best place but with this film it never really feels like it's started. You go from scene to scene expecting all the pieces to come together in a fluid way but they never do. 

We are pulled in so many different directions from the beginning that it starts to feel like there's too much going on and, as the film progresses, this crack in the foundation gets wider and wider. Tonally, the film is all over the place. It doesn't know what it wants to be. There's no thread that takes you through the plot in a slick and concise way as you stumble clumsily from scene to scene. It doesn't feel like one flowing story and, especially when you have so many different things going on, it should be seamlessly put together. It feels like there was a check list of elements that were required and they built a film around these elements.

I could forgive a lot of the plot holes and narrative issues if I could at least have a good time with it but, my god, it's so monotonous. How can a film about two superheroes fighting be as boring as 'Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice' was? If it had been released 15 years ago it maybe could have been fresh, perhaps even exciting but, in this day and age, we have seen so much better so have come to expect so much more. 

It plays by the numbers and goes where you expect it to. There wasn't much new in there and it had no personality and no character. It's got a dark and brooding tone without the quality to back it up and justify it. 

Nolan's 'The Dark Knight' strikes the perfect balance of dark tone, story, character and action. It set the bar so high and no one has really come close to it, not even Nolan himself with his subpar follow up 'The Dark Knight Rises'.

There are so many meaningless and fatty scenes with dialogue that should have been cut away the instant an editor got their hands on it. The entire film runs like the first cut of a film. First cuts will have absolutely everything in them and it's at that point that you sculpt and mould it into a story. This film seems to have skipped that process and just went straight for release. Obviously this isn't the case but it sure feels close to it. 

For me, Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luthor is one of the worst performances in the film. He does exactly what you'd expect Jesse Eisenberg to do. He's the same character in everything he's in and 'Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice' is no exception. The awkward, fast talking, "intelligent" teenager act is growing old with Jesse Eisenberg and I think he was the wrong choice for the main villain in this film. I think they tried to modernise the character but, in doing so, end up turning him into a pantomime villain. He's over the top (not in a good way) and it becomes embarrassing to watch at times. 

Ben Affleck's Batman was probably the best part of this film. He was damaged and broken which makes him unstable and dangerous. Ideally, he should have had a film of his own. There was too much going on too quickly for us to even get to grips with this new and very different Batman. His introduction was the most development we see in the film and it gave us another layer to Ben Affleck's Batman. However from then, after this hopeful introduction, we are only given pieces of the other well known characters with little to no development to make us care enough to invest ourselves in them. They very much rest on the expectation that the audience already loves the characters which, unfortunately, is both lazy and disappointing. 
Giving us a guy in a bat suit and calling him Batman doesn't necessarily make him Batman.

The trailer definitely showed too much. A common problem these days. 

All of the most interesting moments of the film were showed in the trailer. Not spoiling anything here but the character Doomsday was shown in the trailer so it comes as no surprise when the heroes have to face off against it. 

It looks like the cave troll from 'The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring' and it looks as awful as it does in the trailer, a big hunk of CGI mush. The whole scenario was crowbarred in to give them all something to fight together. 

Of course, not before we get an extended crotch shot of Wonder Woman to introduce us to her character. Played by model Gal Gadot, she gives as good a performance as you'd expect "Miss Isreal 2004" to give. With such pressure on all filmmakers to finally give women the representation they deserve in films, we get the ultimate female superhero - Wonder Woman - with all the sexist glory from the 40's and 50's.

The visuals were one of the more redeemable aspects of the film. They had a very dark stylistic edge to them and packed some great images into the fight scenes but, at the end of the day, it's all just style over substance with Zack Synder. He has some impressive visuals but the storytelling just isn't there.

What's even more frustrating is the fact that it did have some potential. The elements of a great action flick were there but they were just lost in the confusion. There were even some interesting themes and concepts knocking about within the mess. If 45 minutes had been cut off the run time and one story selected to follow, it would have been the foundation of a much better film. 

Overall, the film is boring and sloppy. The whole story and structure were a mess and it stumbles it's way over the finish line with a groan.

I think the over saturation of superhero movies is solely down to us. Despite the quality of the film and the dreadful reviews, the much anticipated 'Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice' had a record breaking opening weekend as it took in an estimated $170 million. That's the biggest opening weekend of all time for a pre-summer release. It just goes to show that if a film makes money, it really doesn't matter how good it is. 

They'll make a lot more of them and they'll make them cheaper in order to capitalise on the superhero surge until it's bled dry. We'll eat up anything with a DC or Marvel logo stamped on it until the next wave hits us. I think it'll be the 'Star Wars' franchise next but, in the meantime, I'm sure we'll get another 8 or 9 DC movies in the next few years with spin offs, prequels, sequels, merchandise, McDonalds toys and TV shows to go along with them.

Does the onslaught ever end?